A letter to a colleague

Dear K,

I have worked with you now for 4 years and I have finally realised how selfish and spiteful you really can be.

We clashed from the start - you disliked me as I threatened your position on the ward even though I was a band below you - and I disliked you because I could not believe how incompetent you really were!

Over the past 4 years we have had to deal with every family crisis as a ward - we have had the bad heads, the constant phone calls from child/husband - whoever the crisis was occurring to at the time - leaving the ward in tears because you should be on holiday but because your selfish husband tore his Achilles tendon you couldn't go!!! the child who has abdominal migraines - our professional opinion on the ward is that this was just to get some attention as you were told she will never grow out of them, but lo and behold 18 months down the line now she has changed schools and is no longer a social outcast they have disappeared!!!

We have been supportive of you when you have had to have 6 months off sick to cope with said child and her condition which included the same child being crowned a carnival queen and going on a 3 day trip to Euro Disney during these 6 months off!

We have supported you when your husband became ill and of course nothing went right and you were off for almost 4 months then - can you see a pattern forming by any chance?

The past 6 months have been relatively quiet - maybe I should have taken this as a warning of things to come?

Our boss went off sick with stress in December - please note, this is proper stress not just stress from not going on holiday! and since then you have tried to undermine me at every corner.

You are not aware of it as I do not bring my personal life to work and share with everyone and anyone who will listen, but about 3 weeks ago I suffered a miscarriage. I have continued to work even doing some double shifts to cover the shortage of staff due to the boss being off sick and another on maternity leave. Have I once taken time off work or walked off the ward for some quiet time - no. I have left my problems at the front door and got on with the job in hand.

You have tried to wean your way into the acting HON good books by being all nice and helpful - what would be helpful K is if you could actually learn how to do the reports that need to be submitted every month regarding finance, sickness, HR issues etc, maybe even do the allocations on a Friday for a change and look at how many patients we have coming in the following week and check that they are appropriate for the ward. Maybe even - god forbid - you could do the off duty! The only problem with asking you to do any of these things would be that you would need at least 3 days to achieve them all when in actual fact they could be done in half a day if all the data is there!

This week is half term, one member of staff is on annual leave, one is off on sick, one is off on maternity leave, another is having 3 days annual leave and I am on a first aid at work course in a neighbouring town 45 miles away for 3 days.

Your weekend didn't go to plan - some argument with husband to the best of my knowledge, so you arrive for work on Monday saying that you haven't slept because of it. You then proceed to spend the whole shift trying to find people to cover the shifts we are short for on Wednesday. Because you can't find anyone, you trot off to the HON and say that I will have to come off of my course - the ward is safely covered it just means that you would have to work just that little bit harder for once in your life!

The course I am doing involves 3 days teaching with written exams at the end of each day and a practical assessment and a multiple choice exam on the last afternoon. Attendance and passing is mandatory for each day/exam! This has cost my ward £200. If I do not go on Wednesday, then I have failed the course and wasted £200 and two days of travelling 90 miles each day!

Today I receive a text from M - you are off sick and I have to come in on Wednesday. This really is the final straw - I am developing myself and trying to ensure that I do not stagnate in my career and you try and sabotage my every move!

This time of year is bad for me with lots of emotions running high, combined with the recent miscarriage, this really has been the last straw!

I have been asked to think about a Thromboprophylaxis nurse job which has just been found funding in the Trust and the way I feel today, I would snap it up without a backward thought. I would miss all of the girls on the ward and I would worry about how they were coping with you in charge, but at the end of the day, it wouldn't be my problem anymore.

So my final thoughts on the matter are this - get a grip woman, the world does not revolve around you and your tragic life. We all have better things to do with our lives and would rather not have to listen to you bleat on again.

Please sort yourself out!

Regards A

PS: I feel much better for getting this off my chest, but I should apologise to anyone who has been unfortunate enough to bother reading it!